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New Beginning

The blue of the night sky, sickly sweet and becoming more purple, the cool emptiness rises up as the flame envelopes the cheap paper and finely ground, deceiving herbs, the lights from the plane in the sky immerse you in wonder, seeing the large trees at the end of the garden give warmth in the dead of winter.

You see the world he was in long ago, as the diffuser bubbles with vapour pouring out of it by a cheap TV, the newness of the life he lived has now ceased, not entirely sure yourself, you can now have confidence that it hasn't all gone your way, going by the signs they've all left, you can't rely on old senses anymore.

It's a whole new product, they've formulated another mixture that's just like the old days, delivered in discreet yellow paper bags with a leaflet advertising "medicinal mushrooms", just nootropics and nothing like magic mushrooms at all, you always tread carefully not to get sick with half the products they stock, a life reduced to searching for anything to help.

He barely registers you in the street, the longest road with no cover from the sun, unbearable in the summer and depressing in the winter, going to get cold drinks from the local shop was always a mission as the queue moved so slowly on the hottest days with the only relief being the blast of cold air as you opened the drinks fridge.

The world is soft as you leave the shop, last night's smoke still has so much to offer, walking down towards the leafy walkway over the other side of the road, he comes up the inclined pavement from the left, going to get his energy drinks and sandwich, the ninety nine pence ones with the most tantalising bubblegum flavour.

Crossing the road as he goes through the shop door, an aura of orange is in the sky, you can taste it as the midday uprising of last night's high makes you slightly anxious, is it going to be like this forever? Falling asleep into the pillow as the bottle of Fanta sits on the table, your phone pings with a notification from "RealmFriendz", the app that puts you into contact with people you cross paths with regularly.

"FilthyMarkus has been near you 3x this week!" the notification says, as you drift off after picking your phone up to see what the ping was, three hours pass before you wake up again and the notification persists when you pick your phone up again, you tap on to the app and the number one appears in front of a red circle in front of a location pinpoint icon.   

Taken immediately aback as the selfie of him appears, the option to send a "like" is big with the "ignore" option smaller, your finger hesitates slightly with it millimetres from the plastic of the screen, a wave of energy up your spine at lightspeed, a green tick appears with the words "Like sent to FilthyMarkus".

You don't go back on the app until the notification comes up that it is a match, knowing how flimsy the the app is you make sure you do it all properly, the program faffs around a bit before presenting you with a chat screen, a speech bubble appears for two seconds and then it disappears, unsure of your imagination.

Hesitating as you send "Hey x" and the sending sound plays, the speech bubble appears twice before going away both times, exiting the app once more a notification flashes at the top of the screen, he has replied with "Hey, whats up?" as a tingle in your spine flares up.

Progressing the conversation forward, getting lost into the night as the amnesia that was stolen from your risky journey into bliss, takes hold with your own internal thoughts hoping this will come to an end by tomorrow.

You plan to meet up tomorrow outside the shop, as anxiety atypically builds, the high coming to an end with a sudden jolt back to reality, was this all in your head? Shoving a Rustlers burger in the microwave for your tea, it's all you can manage for now as the lemonade from the side refreshes you, the microwave dings as you worry how you could hold yourself together for tomorrow with how dishevelled you are.

The evening passes in a blur as you wake up slightly refreshed the next day, having a cold shower that cools the humidity of your flat away, the fleeting feather of left over libido from the joint, rests on your lower back with the tingle that draws desire where it's needed.

Making a light breakfast with the clock counting down with the meeting planned just before lunch, hoping he'll grab you a Red Bull before you head back to his, the great unknown with anything to take you out of the stagnation.

Standing by the metal bench waiting for Markus to arrive from the walkway past the pharmacy, the minutes pass with the butterflies that tease the base of your stomach, wishing they'd fly into the wind that blows past your face.

The imagination of the smell of the potent herb fleets powerfully, setting off disallowed emotion, a focal point that numbs the surprise of him appearing as you thought he would, the jolt of anxiety that comes with meeting a stranger, flattened by the dirty and deep that is becoming scary in itself.

"You alright?" he says, as your initial response has you worried about how you appear, but nothing in his eyes is imperfect, the distortion he knew long ago, is now a pin sharp reality that sees the beauty in you.

Grabbing a few cans of Dragon Soop and a few bags of knibbles from the shop, the conversation flows effortlessly, your mind playing a trick that gives you that confidence, unsure of your own motive, being drawn to him as suddenly this is the best day you've had in months.

The pavement is drowned in autumn leaves, a long road with various closes of houses on the other side, underfoot is muddy as you arise on the pavement from the large tree as you go past the community centre, the sky dims with grey clouds.

Learning so much about him on the walk up the hill past recently cut down trees, “just down there” he says as there is a walkway past the side of the block of flats, turning right past the dodgy neighbours front door.

"So this is the guy" you think to yourself as you recollect everything you've learned about him, the effortlessly styled look has you entranced, offered to go into the living room to chill, the hand placed on his chest, as soft as the feather before, taken away by your own emotional depth, moving to the bedroom with only that non verbal desire.

Thrown on the bed with consent, you beg to know why your clothes are still on, noticing the curated display on the clothes drawer, books and other artworks adorn the drawer by the wall, displaying fine symbolism among the pictures.

Getting more comfortable in the center on the bed and horizontal from the pillows, he pulls your jeans down as your breathing intensifies, emotion collapses as the first sense of your sexuality begins to emerge, holding the hair on his head as his tongue teases through the fabric, bringing your jeans over your knees.

You come back up for a kiss, it is all new without that instruction, finally free from the numbness that has consumed so many years, the moment only buys surprise as he gives you oral, you've never felt it so deep before, perfectly slow as you'd always loved sex.

Allowing you to moan without prejudice, you get wetter as your hands explore him, his body breaking that grey and humid existence, pulling each others t-shirts off, your breasts feel full against your bra as he kisses them softly, you almost gasp in pleasure.

Coming down to kiss your neck softly, you revel in the moment before taking a break to take your bra off, your nipples hard and begging to be touched as he does just that, making way for your throbbing flower as the position is perfect for sex as he grabs a condom.

Butterflies surge in your stomach as you weakly gasp and go in for another kiss, longer and more passionate than before, his cock taking you by surprise as it teases your outer lips, feeling almost like morphine as it enters you.

The entire shaft slowly goes in until it is all the way in, pulling back as he kisses your neck again, in once again as your wetness covers the condom, slowly increasing speed for the next whole minute as he worships your body with his lips.

The bed begins to shake as you feel every thrust with the springs holding the weight of you and him together, he moans masculinely in your ear as you moan in synchonicity, your nipples tingling with arousal as he just knows, of course, sucking on them will send you even deeper into a pit of pleasure, and it does.

Your flower is so absurdely wet, it begins to wet the duvet as you wonder why you love this sex that's fast, and with no other guy that did it like this did you cum, but it just makes sense as your curves create a spectacle, both sweaty and a mutual orgasm less than ten seconds away.

Both moaning loud and with no restraint, you both cum as you feel it in your stomach and a loss of executive function takes place as you collapse with half awareness that you have, he falls next to you as you collect yourself, a wave of relaxation consumes you. 

He freed you from what he once knew.   

The Halfway Point

Making your way down, the cold and crisp air becomes a breeze as the perfectly blue sky illuminates the clouds, the aroma of a bustling town is comforting for now, only a few more directions are needed to follow to get home.

The novelty of your new discovery, one you can barely contain in yourself with the blowing out of a candle, you never knew social media would have you strung out on the edge of ecstacy, a little world in your own imagination, an absurd fantasy as people walk past, with you almost losing your way.

Tackling the exertion as you carry your bags up the small incline, scrambling for your keys as you arrive at your front door, the weight you feel as you finally make it into the front room and shove the bags down on the sofa, releases quickly.

Sorting your purchases in each bag is a job in itself, you can never seem to find the cupboard space for anything anymore, each thing as useful as the last, a diary filled with random thoughts, a folder with all your important documents, you'd been far too busy in the past week to dig deep enough for anything else, not even the little pocket of photos you loved looking through.

You have a call booked at 2pm to discuss some boring and inane matters with someone from the council, something about an historical housing benefit claim you'd long forgotten about, you hurry to ready yourself as it's now twenty past one, laying on your bed with your phone next to you, a few random post-it notes you'd written with a few un-memorable details jotted down to the other side.

You pick up your phone and set it so that only the call can come through with no interference from other applications, that anxiety creeps in, going to close the Facebook application you accidentally allow it to open and it refreshes the feed, without a fleeting thought, you go to close it again, but your eyes drag down like they fall down a waterfall, nervous pain as they descend.



Not wanting to admit it, the top post is another one of them, that red pyramid in a profile circle, "Erotic Writing" written next to it, closing your eyes, knowing you can't go there this time - but then you remember another thing you need from your drawer, that bloody National Insurance card with the number you could never remember.

Opening the wooden drawer at the top of the chest of drawers, on the right side, scrambling around through piles of paper, the odd birthday card before you reach the fabric bottom, a small bag filled with random bits, your hand begging to come into contact with the decades old plastic card that had long developed several cracks, before a few fingers touch something firm, a firmness that instantly tingled your spine, and everything you'd forgotten about for this moment, apart from today's daydreams.


The mind diverted into impossible realms, your own sensibility holding you together as you recoil for a moment, a drip of suggestibility falls in your mind, before subconciously biting your lip, stopping half way as you are brought back to your senses, looking into the drawer and your mind blank, your phone still lit bright on that screen, another story post.

Facial movements mildly berkserk, the time continuing to move towards the mundane phone call, the unknown of if you'll ever be able to rearrange it, your fingers softly clasping the underside of the bag holding your favourite toy, as it had been a few weeks since you really let loose, the tingles in your flower, you want to ignore but you remember the lightness you felt after orgasm, at your last visit to his website.

Now ten minutes to go until two o'clock, feeling your body pushing you into accepting that you are indeed feeling horny, slowly pulling the bag out and placing it onto your bed, sitting down and picking your phone up, tapping once to make the screen light up again from a dim state, a tingle going down the spine as the link on the post displays the almost usual now, painted artwork with the pyramid displayed next to their embrace.

The fabric bag still sealed by string, as you lay back and take it with you, hurrying to your phones settings screen to block all incoming calls, going back to Facebook and tapping the link before placing your phone beside you and untying the string that holds the top of the bag together, the silicone of the toys control panel never felt so smooth as it did now.


Feeling the full weight of the toy as you pull it out of the bag, you place it beside you as you take your t-shirt off, over the shoulders as your bra feels slightly restrictive, running your fingers faintly along the top of your breast as you then scramble to take your jeans off, it is so fulfilling as the fabric against your flower feels exquisite, the light press with the roughness of your jeans.

The page loads up inside the Facebook app, the title words changing before the majority of the screen turns black, various images load as the text takes its place in white, “oh god” you think to yourself as it’s now three minutes to two.

Delegating your composure, your body moves without meaningful sense, trapped between what you know is right and your unconcious commitment to what is needed, the blue sky is a warm and gut dropping tension in the room as it appears through the window.

The first words rivet through you, setting the scene with a mention of the season, a detail drawn to impress before the emotion of the stories male lead comes in, you'd fallen so far in love with these passages, kept private from the draw of the community surrounding his work, now desperate for another release as you've given in, the clock at the far end of the room ticking past 2 o'clock.

Your index fingers slowly breaking the fabric of your knickers apart from your hips, a teasing flirtation of pleasure at the base of your spine, going into the allure of others, you are just for yourself as the outside world is none the wiser, that loss of control from an orgasm, maybe the neighbours will be privy, but how would you know?

The knickers go past your feet as you spread your legs, huffing as you desperately need to unclasp your bra without any hesitation as something you just need to do, the clip comes apart and you feel the release as the right shoulder strap falls down your arm, the cup coming apart and you commit yourself to this, your nipples almost painfully hard as you scramble to take the bra off completely.

Your flower waiting as you go back to your phone and continue to read, the intense details turn a desperate libido into drips of wetness, picking your toy up and making yourself comfortable with your legs spread further, the parting of your flower intensely tingles as you read further as the mysterious build up to the sex was always something novel.

Turning your toy on, a low hum is felt in your hand, weak, flustered and shaky, sliding the hand as it holds the toy, down your leg as a sensation is felt with the head of the toy not millimetres from your clitoris, the male lead in the story starts getting inside your head, as he is your supposed character, feeling a little guilty as he'd turned you on so much, she doesn't know whats in store, only one more paragraph and she'll be ravished.

Slowly welcoming the toy inside you, that low hum isn't enough as one more press of the plus icon on the control panel as your flower fully wakes up, the wetness now indiscriminate with the little rabbit nodule now coming close to your clitoris, you feel flushed as the details of the sex the characters are having becomes frank and graphic of which you indulge.

You see notifications at the top of your phone screen saying that calls are being blocked, the guilt lessens with each thrust of the toy, the words of the story becoming more perfect as if it was written just for you, impossible but with the affinity it always had, and without awareness of why it should be here, with you.

The shade of sunlight through the window, seeming so redundant as you chase a climax, your thumb joint aches as you reach the end of the story before the detail gets ever so sweet, the rabbit pressing firmly against your clitoris as the very moment of your movement has been forgotten, you recoil as you lose control of your phone, quickly scrolling up and the pyramid appears again, your heart flutters and you begin to sweat.

Memories of that one fling, the slow press against your skin, the warmth of his breath against your ear as your throat sunk and butterflies circled the bottom of your abdomen as his moans send you into a frenzy that make you climax with a fantastical burst that drowns the mattress cover.

You have lost all track of time as it is now twenty past three, feeling lightheaded for a moment, your soul is as heavy as a feather as you beam with positivity, unable to wait to grab that sugary snack in the other room. 


Beginning with the delight of the sun, captivating even the smallest of details in the fine surreal, life feeling like a movie as things become very real. It's been a short while since I was last in your sights, a reconnection that funnily seemed to blossom, exacting the time I thought well of you, buying into what it means to be human.

Only you have the patience with me, a half hour drive before an evening of waiting for the rest of them to return from Milton Keynes, you didn’t want to have to waste an evening so close to Christmas. Killing time in the Lexicon shopping centre and the lights are dimming in the restaurant alley as it nears closer to closing time, we’ll be strangers past then, well known to moonlight, the chill filling me with nostalgia, only you could bring that out of me.

They text us that they are ten minutes away, I feel relief that we definitely won’t be hanging around the Princess Square car park, listening to 90’s hits on the Bluetooth with the air con blasting maximum heat. 

We get back and they’ve been there only two minutes, waiting for us to join them before going to the front door and providing the key that I accidentally left inside without noticing before leaving for our little relaxed reunion. 

They let us in and I do a little whoop as the key was exactly where I left it, on the worktop, my home feeling remarkably cosy and a half hour catch up and they are away to go and spend Christmas down on the coast.

Our attention turns to each other as a few drinks and snacks are shared, getting increasingly closer with modesty and polite restraint, admitting our lust is a secret etching closer in secret to each other. 

The time getting almost obscenely late, just two minutes past midnight, my thoughts wondering as to what happens next, the last snowdrops brushing against the outside glass to the windowsill. 

You look at me in a way I’ve never seen before, owing to your emotion and command over me, in a few short minutes we are in each others arms. 

Before you know it, kisses on your neck, leading into us getting undressed and a few short moments of unknowing leading me to going down on you. The full embrace of sex is upon you as I return to let you feel me, a soft mix of your favourite type of oral and the perfect physicality.

The room heats up, your heart racing faster as everything now a mix of our over the counter fragrances and our bodies seducing each other into unbelievable relief into a cloud.

I passionately kiss you as my cock is now deep within you, you are insanely wet as I am hard, you know this shouldn’t be decadent, but in fact redefining decadence into an admittance of love, which you’ve never indulged.

The bed moves along with our thrusts, the technicalities are no matter for us as this is heaven, as almost the end of this, the lightness of a feather within you will be the treat you forgot you were going to get.

I get faster and you compliment it with your moves, all your wobbles now frantic, but no matter to me as I always see them as beautiful. Your expressions show desperation for orgasm as do mine, me painfully eager and you to receive.

If only time could spare us a few more minutes of this sex, but it’s not to be as you feel the build in your stomach, one of those long orgasms that start soft and take an eternity to climax. 

You can’t take much more, sliding your hands up and down my back as my moves themselves take you over the edge, warmth consuming you with a bit of mindlessness as our sounds can’t be described in words.

If only they knew of this, the evening is everything I’ve wanted to return.


Before the moon descends, the frost on the window grows more imposing on every day into this December, only recently started after a dragging November. The radiators sparingly placed around my home, always come on slightly too late for a breakfast in warmth, your feather touch, on my chest, always beckons the emotional extremity of every winter.

I've always wanted to go back to the glory days before all this began, everyone still in abundance at our work, now everyone is so busy with their own lives, the freezing burn of the snow, on fingertips, is how it all gets treated nowadays, but in you I find all the potential. If only the day could change, waiting for you to come home, beginning with every evening that we'd plan the art meticulously, always the beauty of the sex afterwards that's been designed to be otherworldly and borderline spiritual.

Untangling the struggle of the day, spending most of it sat at my laptop, making green tea and pesto pasta for lunch, the midday sun turning the ice to half water as it is uncomfortable, still the scent in the air has me falling in love with my memories again. Getting anxious for my files for the day to send through to the company system, inserting my company key card to verify my identity, a slight chill coming through the window, placing my feelings in what I'm doing, all in you.

Not before long, it is just after 5pm, you message me on WhatsApp to let me know you are on your way home, a small relief comes over me and I fire up the oven to prepare to make dinner. Only niggling on the subject of sex tonight, fleeting light flirting during the day has had me feeling it in the pit of my stomach.

You arrive home, the wheels of the car graze against the gravel, a much self limiting butterfly transcends to my spine, I know you put the cute lingerie on underneath your work attire, the frills of your bra perfectly accentuating your bust.

The cooking of dinner is on a mindless autopilot as we become closer at each of our last bite, with the happiness of the evening moving into the bedroom. The abyss of the winter night sky, the scent coming through as we now adorn the bed of which we’ve shared many a desperate sweat in the pursuit of orgasm.

You can’t withhold exclaiming on the sensation of me going down on you, buying into that forgotten reality once again as you are extremely wet, only seen on screens decades ago but for us it is reality.

You proudly spread your legs, marvelling at the softness of my body, as am I for you, as I come down to make love to you in missionary, the sex starting slow yet you couldn’t care of the technicalities. 

You feel my cock get harder inside you, of course it is only natural as I lick your nipples, my lips pressing against the softest front of your breast. You don’t know how but you’re enjoying my cock and mouth as one, it’s an unbearable pleasure but you are now at one with it, the synchronicity of the sex is the language spoken all over the world, even at the same time as us.

I begin to get faster as the joy builds into one with us, we both unrelentingly moan, yours not knowing no restraint. We are both extremely aroused and this now allows for a beautiful orgasm as we feel the sweat, your squirt soaking into a puddle between us. 

We both go to resume our evening, not a word said, for us it’s our natural care.


All the places I have been, all in this one, my being in the walls as any trace of me removed from every other. The sudden cold snap from a falsely warm October day, the air comes through the now open window, my bedroom warm and humid from a single night. Wanting to break away from the mistakes of my past, only you can take it all away, surely the time can pass in uneven measure, a small amount of anxiety in my stomach.

If the day passes without limitation, it would be perfect, the feelings touching new places within me, that extra step boils the fear which only finding out, will replace. The past time has been obvious but I am pushing myself, little do I know all will come naturally. Now feeling the genuine tension, everything delayed. I have to be perfect but this is, for once, not something formal.

As the freedom is enjoyed, my usual thoughts are muffled, as I dim the room and watch the scenery go by on the screen as a deep chill playlist on YouTube hums through the speakers in the background. The next hour or so seems a blur, and then you knock on the door, and everything seems so natural.

Only riding on my conscience, but it’s all forgotten, assuming all I know from before, and with that the lovemaking is sublime, taking you doggystyle into the most amazing moans, from you, I’ve ever heard. 

Your pussy ever so wet, my cock feeling like you expected, just as you’ve loved before. The butterflies forming in the bottom of your stomach, just as you would want to masturbate to this, even I’ve wondered how you would fantasise, when this is so unique to us, it is all so special and memorable.

As I expend all my energy as you are now on top, it is matched by you as the heat in the room becomes almost a climate with our exchange of movement. I am seeing a rise in you, you’d never normally be like this until we did it this evening, letting go of modesty.

It becomes totally physical and sweaty, all emotion forgotten as I endeavour to have a release for both of us, my cock suddenly rock hard as you seductively moan and the sheets are drowned, I’m completely done in, in one orgasmic moment.

And with that, these walls I will remember.



On the account of the moving traffic, you adjust your make up at the first oppurtunity of a stand still, something so erudite in your mind, bringing what could be immaterial. 

The time is right for that anxiety, you had been fooled by excitement in the weeks leading up to this, you'd been so cruelly made to put on a front this whole time, something only me and you should know. A million thoughts race through your mind, the re-introduction of butterflies and the deep fall into an unashamed giving in. 

If only they had been more unassuming, our little fling tonight would be less of a surprise between us, the mystery and cold of the past two years has truly set the tone. In my mind, thoughts circle of years ago, longing for the grey of those days, simpler times where joy was adundant, finding that in you, realising more over the past few months, but now it cannot be denied.

The only question for yourself should be, do you really want it all to collapse within you, as the emotion built up, and upon a dimmed room, candles on the burn, a heavenly scent that makes it all porno-esque. You saw my lowest, and my happiest, you've fallen for me but these have been the most life changing few years, and tonight is the climax of that movie.

You take my hand and lead me up to the bedroom, you’ve never been here before but your inquisition is seamless as it is magic. You could be a hero to yourself as it finally dawns that this could be good for you, I can see the sadness even though thrilling in the moment, all the changing seas of emotion, yesterday will collide tonight.

Being gentle to me as you lay back, allowing me to do as ever as I please, adding your own touch that teases into a release from each bit of pain we’ve endured, as if morphine is working exactly with every graze of my hair, my tongue as ever blissful against your flower.

The sex progresses and I begin to do you Doggystyle, my taking the lead, you have no hesitation about revealing yourself in what no one but me has seen, we’ve both had nights in front of the screen, it just didn’t care about their pleasure, but it is so demanding of love for us.

The rest of the evening there is no tension for me, as the orgasm was entertaining yet sent us into a dream as if we are the only people in the world, everything else must be like the cold, even if we miss it, it takes it all away.

The Journey

Below the steps was the walkway through the underpass, a colder day than usual, thunderstorms forecast with a tingle in the pit of my stomach, it had been five weeks before I'd last seen you. A long day at the office, a building held together by 1960's concrete, still, there's not much left like this now, happier memories of years gone by, my feet aching already and not even out of town.

Long before and I am down the sloped parade of shops, feeling the sharp haze of the sun as it had begun to set, turning left down another parade, past endless charity and pound shops. Just before I begin walking down the brick steps, I feel a jiggle in my pocket, my phone has had a message, I had been blasting music through my headphones, so everyone else none the wiser.

It’s you.

Sending a little tease of what’s in store at home.

I look up quickly not realising I've now come to the old concrete area for the old market, a concrete roof with the pillars, just before where the market runs now, but not for long, my gut sinking as I make up the steps at the side, excitement as now in the open, I cannot withold myself from going to awnser your message, hoping no one knows what we're up to.

Walking through the underpasses down into the little village where we have lived for the past few years, all in that time, I have come to feel all that time and everything at once, all in you. I manage to reply to you, the only words I can muster are that I'm on my way home, my excited self, flummoxing any hint of sexiness, but you knew me all along, it's only until the passion kicks in that I unleash. You've always loved the hard line between my outward self and the intensities of the private.

Before long, dinner is on the table and is only just going warm from hot, after our many a frolic, you've felt all kinds of things this evening, the butterflies as I kiss your lips, a tingle of the pussy as I do your neck. Maybe if we weren't so quick, or ignorant of the world around us, this wouldn't be on point, hot heavy sex.

You get on all fours and expect nothing less than doggy style, you weren't expecting me to work myself into eating your pussy first, you cling to the sheets as you can't contain the pleasure, almost begging me to just fuck you already. 

I have no care for anything else as I get into the zone, this will be just like your wildest dream, my cock teasing your outer lips as when I finally insert, you moan beautifully. The bed carries us as we fuck, I come down and kiss the backs of your shoulder blades, increasing your wetness and feeling sweet. Once more and my thrusting gets perfect for you, looking back at me it is carnal, we both have no shame in being hot and sweaty. 

You start to feel a pit in your stomach as you begin to reach orgasm, polite moans from both of us turn almost disrespectful in volume and lust. Slowly it unfolds, you have no concern about whether it will happen, but it's too late now to say we can go to bed tonight in clean sheets.

Under The White Arches

The sun begins to blend into the clouds, over the horizon, golden with a hint of undescribable colour, the walkway paved immaculately, only nothing but luxury drives down this road. I hurry back to the bar, to allow that dusk to turn to a chill, and for the stars to appear, anxious, excited, yet comfortable as a sex symbol myself, the room dark, yet lit by an abstract rainbow jar display behind the counter. 

The barman pours me a drink, little did I know this would be the least of the details I would remember by tomorrow, you text me to let me know you are five minutes away, I recollect myself and make my way to my room. It would only be pleasantries, much to my inner dissagreement, every time I've met you, the tension is undeniable, so obvious and I just want to give in, I have rarely wanted something to be real, this much.

Up some white steps with brown carpet mostly covering each step, my sleek dress holding me together before my footsteps echo down the hall, the sound of me putting the keys into the lock, rich yet elegant as had been by my demeanour this whole time. 

A few days ago we found out on WhatsApp that we’d be in London the same day, I braved to ask if we could meet up, and like that I was genuinely excited when you agreed, my doubt had come in while debating with myself about whether to ask.

Standing on the balcony, the temperature is perfect, a rare bit of reprieve from the almost hellish summer we had endured only a few weeks before, the stars now as mystifying as they ever could be. A tingle forms in my lower spine as I hear a faint knock on the door, I don't know whether this will be my nerves setting in, but all the little details are muffled as I hyper focus on appearing sober and put together. 

The golden door handle feels chilly as I open it, my fight or flight reflex forces me to just go with it, but before me is a feeling of relief, a wave of shyness and lust.

Before I know it, many pleasantries are had, the friendly hug and kiss on the cheek, you’ve brought a bottle of champagne, unusually not what I looked forward to the most, I just want our flirty little conversations about sex, over the past five years, to become reality.

You ask me how I’ve been, I’m relieved our conversation takes that easy turn, I try so subtly to get closer, without giving the game away. The conversation flowing well, I so far haven’t broached that subject of our cheeky chats on the phone, but I am very close to erupting that sexual tension, that you could cut with a knife.

“So, err, what’s the occasion for bringing me here, then?”, you ask, without a rude tone, the suggestive manner makes my stomach sink, my pussy becomes alert.

I collect myself and guide you through a series of flirtations, but, after all that, your hand now guiding itself up my thigh. The silk of the bottom of my dress is no deterrent, I just want time to stop as I feel the beginnings of you touching my upper thigh, while kissing my neck, my pussy is helpless and weak. 

I feel like I am in a movie, you pick me up while we kiss passionately, my Honey Birdette knickers now dishevelled with my own wetness, I beg you to tear them off of me as you pull them down at speed, over my knees and past my toes, to be thrown, but I can’t even feel the care within to me to see where they landed.

You stand at the end of the bed, me now playing with myself just taking in every moment, I help you take your jeans off, unbuckling your belt, my throat sinks as you have genuinely the biggest cock I have ever seen, a sight bringing so much desire within me that I am only focused on my orgasm - there will be no challenges for that tonight.

You turn me over to do me doggy style, spitting on your cock for lube, but my god it doesn’t need it, you begin powerfully thrusting and I can’t help but moan, I’ve never had sex before that was so easy, intense and satisfying. 

I am taken aback by the spanking, my bum the perfect platform for that kinky delight, my checks ripple so noticeably that my pussy feels it, where there’s a spark of pain, I feel the pleasure in my abdomen. 

Your cock feels like morphine, I don’t have to think about moving to compliment you, I just want you to take me with your full length, I have never been this wet.

We turn over and you are now fucking me missionary, I didn’t know such an old favourite position could be so rough, carnal and yet, romantic and beautiful. Your chest up against mine as we both start to sweat, a gym workout, I guess neither of us are newcomers to that, emotional as we feel each other’s breath, my hard nipples against your chest as you go to suck, this sex is so otherworldly.

I lose control of my being, I begin to cum, the world and my life flashes before my eyes in a way only seen in my dreams, the sheets now soaked as the sight many upon many wish they could see, unfolds before us both.

It’s twenty minutes before I can think again, my legs jelly, every finger I place on myself, causes sexual pin pricks of pleasure. I feel unbelievably light as you softly kiss my neck, shoulders and breasts. 

I return to my daily life a new person, my body aches for days afterwards, but genuinely, it was so worth it.

The Promise

Upon the top of the cliff edge, the lighthouse in the far distance, the needles create the path to that tower, the tingle at the bottom of your spine, anxiety of an evening.

This is the last stop before we head to the restaurant for our booked table, 6.30pm on the final few evenings of our holiday. The skyline has provided plenty of distance from the stress of work, 300 miles away, only five hours a day working from home, most people not so lucky, but as the evening draws in, you feel a relief that just hasn't hit the same as many years before.

Fifty-Five Portdown Road, the Velvet Appetit restaurant, in between many other weird and wonderful businesses, a building much higher and a few floors taller than the row of restaurants, small department stores and sex shops that lined the road, the upper floors rented out for performance artists and various studios.

The waiter sees us to our table, the cloth already laid, the menus bound together by burgundy leather, the dishes curated with intent to be crafted with love, every last mouthful, the main, tangy on the tongue, the dessert, like a cloud of sweetness, melting instantly.

We are so openly amorous to everyone around us, never giving too much away but the other diners can feel uneasy at the sexual tension and platonic chemistry between us. Only upon many delicious bites taken does it seem to flow seamlessly before we are back at the hotel, after getting checked in, showing our ID's, you cheekily and playfully holding my hand and guiding me to the room. 

You slowly take your jacket off, as I work on unbuttoning my shirt, and jeans, all becomes clearer to my amazement, you’ve concealed the most amazing lingerie underneath your evening attire, I had been none the wiser this entire time. The revelation like a little promise, entrenched in however hot your passion may be.

Many moons ago, a hotel visit would make me long for an experience like this, the nostalgia of visiting friends and family, amplifying that butterfly in my stomach, only this time it’s beyond my archaic upper ceiling of emotion.

You have me laid on the bed, your movements holding me down like a prisoner in heaven, cheekily goading me into foreplay, I’ve never felt the magic of fingers like this before, new details of both me and you coming to the forefront.

The atmosphere becomes more knowing and comfortable, before long you are riding me, the length and moistness of my cock sending shivers up your spine. You begin bouncing on it as I do my best to go deep at the perfect pace, complimenting your figure as you come down to kiss my neck, which is surely returned.

We are both putting the work into the sex, now both hot and sweaty as the bed begins to creek under our weight, I give one last go of energy as my thrusts bring you to orgasm, the sweetest moans from the both of us make it more intense. 

You collapse on to the bed, us both exhaling in relief as the final fleeting blow of pleasure is ever so relaxing. 

This is our new yearly tradition.


Deep Dezire

You help yourself to the chocolate bar on the work top, an experience suddenly melting on the tongue, only time can tell how you’ll feel deep down, the sun blazing outside, your flat only half equally distributing the heat. 

Dust settles on the bookcase beside your desk, the buttons on your iMac’s keyboard as seamless as ever as you notice the bookcase as the sun’s rays hit your shoulders. Your bum begins to ache as you realise you've been sitting far too long, 3.48pm suddenly, and the trees outside are golden as what's left of your nostalgia for summers gone by, comes fleeting in, the industrial aroma is what's left of the euphoria.

Only you can know the relation to your story, cosy warmth and that of safety, but things like this always came with procastination. That work, creative and unnurtured, frequent trips to those funny and cat videos, anymore longer and it'll be adult ones. Maybe the Amazon Prime Now order can wait, the monotony of this afternoon tempts you further away, you know you really shouldn't, but what is life if you can't enjoy it?

You pull your dress up and pull your lacey primark knickers down, a little tingle in your spine as the fabric feels warmer that usual against your buttocks, over your knee and past your feet. You involuntarily check out the window, even though 2 floors up and hidden, so bare and vulnerable, yet taken by temptation.

One hand presses the thumb pad on your laptop and opens a new tab, the other hand massaging your outer lips, your breasts enlarging slightly as shots of pleasure shoot within you, you can feel your nipples hardening in blissful torture.

Beginning the search for a nice porn video to aid in your bliss, the frequent searches list on PornHub provides the inspiration, you are such a naughty girl, for such a respectable person. One of the items on the list makes you sigh, and you click directly on to it, your favourite video, third down from the top, you click once again, the page starts loading in as the buffering circles start swirling.

You are now lost in the moment, locked in the pursuit of orgasm, the pre-video advert has played and the grey line indicating how far the video has loaded comes bounding in, and now the orange bar is coming in. Taken in by the erotic display before you, you marvel at the mans physique, the woman's body complimenting it perfectly as her soft skin ripples as he fucks her.

You want it so badly, your heart almost sinks as you are now deep in masturbation, your wetness barely witholding itself from dripping on to your seat, tense as you are, you race to get the most satisfaction from the best parts of the video, the ones that make you crave someone's touch, however powerful or soft you would like it.

Your breasts almost falling out of your dress as the straps have long fallen down, your forehead sweaty and your chest, you don't care about the ever increasing humidity that is more noticeable in your state of excitement. Thankfully, it is easy, all this culminates in an orgasm, like that first bite of chocolate with a caramel centre, you lose all care for the fact you've squirted on the floor, the little giggle within the next few seconds completes it.

As you pull your dress back together, you fling your knickers away into the laundry bin, you've earned the luxury of lighter dress this hot summers day, the simplicity and peace of years gone by, back once again.



You have a glint in your eye as the sunlight tears into your eyes, a quick glance upwards as you feel my touch on your shoulder, from an inperceptable blink to the rush from a kiss, blending into one. The scene nowhere near epic, yet you and I, unknown to you, haven't felt like this since life was free from responsibility, tapping into butterflies when the warmth hits, equal to times that are a struggle to remember.

Your feet ache after the few hours of the walk in amongst the outside, only a few minutes reprieve as mentioned before, the car park now in front of us. Only the warm car, summer air a breeze in the open window, can add the sharp tinge to your feelings for me, like the deep blue skies of summers a decade ago, constant learning on a cloud of unknowing joy.

With only the front door keys in my hand, it is simplistic, a quick dinner and then you wonder what could happen, you’ve been indecisive over fantasizing, but the bubble shall burst, with full force, you try and act perfectly to not scupper the chance.

The creaminess of the cheddar grated on top of the spaghetti, ever so much more tangy, a few hours has passed and this is the best spag bol you’ve tasted, only comparable to your fathers cooking, it’s as if I am in possession of the best recipe, and on top of it all, the key to your heart.

It seems ever so much an accident, now in my bed, the tension in awe and shock as we rush to get naked. Only our intimacy can break the togetherness of the day, from giggles to an everlasting build of wetness and pleasure, begging to burst into an orgasm as I can’t get enough of your moans that make me harder and faster.

You get on top of me, my cock feeling like morphine, your abdomen feeling like taking the first bite of an amazing dessert as I lightly kiss your neck and cheek, the unbelief that sex is to follow makes you crumble. 

Exactly as expected, euphoria enthralls as we end up with you laid down, me perfectly fucking you, no awkwardness, no need to adjust. Feeling the humidity as I come down for a genuine missionary, you wish time would stand still as your breasts touch my chest, you never knew they were capable of being that erogneous. 

Maybe it can’t be explained, the four seconds of unawareness that just exist of joy, as you lose control and orgasm spectacularly, no control over yourself but picturesque, like a painting, the sound would be Hollywood worthy.

You’ve come a long way, but you’ve found the new way to learn.


The warm burn of the sun, hits your shoulders, on the little mud footpath, beside a field, separated by a fence in the English countryside. You stop to take a sip from the water bottle now slowly turning warm, as it was fresh from the fridge this morning, in anticipation for your feet hurting just after the third mile, in the autumn that has now come around.

The track lasted for 2 more miles, as you see a little crossing, where a bench was placed, along with the signpost detailing all the places in this little corner of the countryside you saw as your yearly retreat. A walk by yourself to let go of all the trips to the office, your company swiftly stopping working from home, that reset over the two years shows it’s reality. 

There is a little incline as you walk towards the bench, as the ground gets more stoney as they hurt your feet more than they would have an hour ago at the start of your walk. You take another sip of your water, a drip falls between your lip and the lid, falling onto one of the sequins of your blouse, you inconspicuously register this as you are focused on just getting to the bench. Faint memories of every passing moment, your first trip here seems like a lifetime ago, although not that long ago, you've never known true nostalgia, coming to the end of your youth, those butterflies so new.

You sit down on the bench and take a breather before you register your surroundings, the wooden gate you went through, behind you, the autumn smell of recently rained on grass and gravel, activated by the warmth of the sun, this is second to every experience you wished could last forever. Maybe it is by chance it is rarely a landscape, where today, there isn't anyone around. 

A few minutes passes and you decide to stay here for a while, ten to four in the afternoon and you know it will be 7pm before you sit down for dinner, as the sun sets. You can only forget so much in this place, the atmosphere putting you into a deeper lull as you realise this is what you've wanted all along, you don't want to leave.

The way the flowers just over the path sway in the distance, the vista and aura triggering a lack of awareness, a scene from high art but totally unlike you. You notice your own whirlwind of femininity, falling deeper into that state of mind only reserved for your private moments, a fit guy on social media, your toy deep in your sock drawer.

Your stomach drops as you feel your nipples starting to become erect, this is no time or place, what if a stranger passes by? You feel a hope that it will go away, but you want the experience to become real, even more. You sigh in repreive, you can do it discreetly, timidly placing your right hand on your lower abdomen, trying not to acknowledge the butterflies now creeping down to your lady parts, your hand pretending like this isn't the case.

Your yellow blouse, that ever so perfectly accentuated your curvy figure, stands in between your hand and your knickers, upon realising this, you mentally plan a quick way to take them off and stuff them in your bag, taking an extended break to look around, to make doubly sure no one is coming.

Raising your knees up, pulling your dress back and pulling your knickers down with army like precision, you shove them in your bag and sit back, doing another look around, the anxiety kicks in as you sit for a minute. You inch your right hand up your thigh, ready-ing your left hand to quickly return your dress to a decent state should anyone come around.

You feel something you've never felt before, your flower tingling with anticipation as you can faintly feel your fingers over your flower as they just pass the immediate inside of your thigh before your flower. The anxiety gradually becomes easier as you now have a hold on your flower, one finger going in as you intuitively go to massage your g-spot. 

Your breathing gets heavier, this will be easy as the amazing pleasure comes in like a waterfall, as softly as a cloud. Almost unaware of your surroundings, you arch your back, this is happening quickly and a moan feels almost as natural as the environment. 

You get closer to orgasm as the pleasure intensifies, you instinctively grab your breast, but with no grip at all, your nipple causing sparks as your palm hovers over it. As you recollect your awareness for one final time, you sink into one of the best orgasm's you've ever had, squirting on to the grass just before the pathway, you feel everything coming away from you as your endorphins mix perfectly with the clouds up above.

No one ever came around to see you getting dressed again, better finish the walk like nothing ever happned.    


The aroma of the dusk raises your euphoria, as the sky is tinted purple, close to midnight, the little village close where your house sits on a corner, feeling more perfect than usual. The coffee you had at 8pm keeping you wide awake, the extended weekend has you feeling a little more playful than usual, maybe a little more horny, you never realised how the day job stopped you exploring your full self, a bit of mental space that has turned you into a full on Ann Summers, Womanizer fangirl.

You have called me over for a bit of fun after an entire day of playing computer games and masturbating, maybe the odd Subway order at lunchtime, I will arrive in about 10 minutes, or so my GPS says, and I WhatsApp you to let you know. You'd always been a little nerdy, so the luxury of having a handsome, good looking man come round for a bit of fun is a rare treat you enjoy like an Tango Ice Blast going to see the latest Lord of The Rings film.

Your anticipation builds, will I be as enthralling as when you briefly met me at the nationwide regional office get together up in London? You make sure both bolts on the door are unlocked as you adjust your lingerie and look into the mirror on the left side of the hallway to make sure you look your best, well, as good as possible after today.

You hear the gravel outside rustle as my 2 seater luxury classic car comes up your driveway, you anxiously prance to the kitchen to make it look like you haven't been waiting by the door when I knock. The sound of my firm, intended knocks makes butterflies flutter in your stomach, without any rehearsal you seductively walk to the door, and seduce me instantly upon greeting me, grabbing my hand and pulling me in.

You pull me closer to you in your kitchen, placing your hand on my chest as the taste of my kisses enthralls you, not one thing wrong with this embrace that seems to quickly end up on your bed, as you spread your legs. 

Your impossibly perfect curves ignite a flame within me, I just want to ravish you as you admire my sculpted torso and male model looks, excited by feeling my short beard. You peal your lacey knickers off from the sides to reveal an almost decadent pussy, my tongue feels like morphine as it slides between the lips and you quickly get wet.

Your body does things you had no idea it could do, the pleasure sending shockwaves up your torso that make you recoil with moans, and your motion communicates ecstacy, you just want this moment to last forever. 

I come away and take my jeans off to reveal my cock as you can't believe this can get any better, me lightly stroking enthralls you as it gets hard quickly, as you grab me in every possible way as the sex initiates. The bed starts relenting as it sounds almost movie-esque, your body heats up with the moment being portrayed, truly one of sex symbols.

My thrusting feels expertly honed as you can now not do anything but build up to orgasm, your moans are music to my ears as I forget all responsibilty not to annoy the neighbours, a few moments of carnal abandon and you shreik in pleasure, as the sheets are soaked. My embrace for the rest of the night culminates in many a day with a spring in your step.   


You can see further into the distance, a sky emblazened in azure, further above the rooftops, you feel free. 

Wondering if it will ever end, the past few months drowned in depression, thrown from a speedy buzz to a mind working too fast, often insulting, it was infectious.

There is a sweet scent in the air, with a warm, summer-esque breeze, and a chill when it gets closer to 5pm, the scent almost like years gone by, being young again without the parts you don't want to remember. A mind many would find hard to tolerate, suddenly with peace and many more to look forward to, easier to wonder in freedom of feeling.

Only you can walk down this beach of euphoria, a summer dress completing your look, nearly back at your flat, a hat provides shade as the breeze blows and feels relaxing. Many monotonous times before this, the only surprise was post sticking out of the back of the letterbox, now it doesn't matter as you look forward to cooking dinner and chilling for the evening.

Only half an hour later the pizza is cooked, stuffed crust with cheese and double pepperoni, a well earned treat, you always knew nothing better, as a rule, to enjoy the nicer things in life upon others.

The sky sharply changes in hue, the most amazing dusk you’ve seen in a good few years, creating a backdrop now hiding behind slowly closing curtains.

You’d forgotten that you’d washed your bed sheets, the soft fabric of the duvet cover, soft friction as it blends with your dress under your buttocks, your knickers now sliding down to enable the most brief yet delicate pleasure.

Your finger slides in, riding against your clitoris as you let out a soft moan, your breasts moulding against the motion behind the neckline of your dress, holding urgently erect nipples behind the material. Spreading your legs further yet in elegance, the full breadth of your fingers over your entire labia.

You only want simple yet warm pleasures, ending in sweat, with that you are in full swing, the guy you saw the other day with his shirt off, today finally allows for you to indulge in what was only a suggestion. 

Before you know it you are shouting in pleasure, your orgasm, the bed sheets soaking and your vocalisations all happen at once in what seems like a blissful mess, out of order and on a cloud.  


With the comforting yet so unspecial air in the room, you have sex, now you trust in me, it is natural.

The afternoon getting closer to evening, you've spent the afternoon in the spare room, doing work for university, wearing that elusive top that is just about tight enough to complement your curves that I have longed for, ever since that summer, my mind at the time, dim yet enlivened by you coming into my life.

I am stuck on this one part of this video game, growing tired as I hold the Xbox controller in my hand, expertly lounging on the comfiest part of the sofa, feet up on the foot rest that I've forgotten how it stands. I'd gotten used to you always appearing at ten past five, always offering to put the kettle on just after you offer, I always feel blissfully guilty, a cloud laced with thorns as I know how lucky I am to have you.

Hearing the spoon touching the sides of the cup in the kitchen, the next room over, I await for you to come and sit next to me and cuddle up, a takeaway was a given on a Friday evening, no need to dread another Waitrose ready meal, our lives demanding of it, oh well, our careers kick off and we'll have much more time to get creative in the kitchen.

You come and sit down next to me, a brief moment of a few words on the screen, filled with black, as the TV changes from the Xbox to the Virgin Media box, the Xbox letting off heat from its vents, a night now certain for that heat to radiate from our bodies, colliding together as a slight sweat, that same loving intrigue about the game, now from giggles as you feel me touch you, all over.

Maybe the takeaway food can wait, surely, if it melts on the tongue, its probably best after a good work out, where every endorphin is triggered as our lips softly peck as we feel the energy build, our skin only as soft as heaven when you cheekily ask for sex.

You always enjoyed me ravishing you, although sweet and kind as you are to others, you beg me to lick your nipples, your breasts naturally gorgeous as nothing phases you, it is all natural and normal to you, I'd never suspected a girl like you to take sex for granted, a once a week orgasm was like your morning vitamin.

In missionary, the bed shaking, the headboard banging against the wall as the bed moves back and forth, your moaning now pornographic yet genuine and demanding more. I sit up and pull your legs up to my chest, knees over my shoulders, my cock now hitting all the right places. 

The workout now promising a long feeling of tranquility post orgasm, and before we know it, the sheets show it can certainly happen.

The Ladies Knight

The light drizzle of rain starts tapping on the roof of the small bus stop, at the crossing on to the main road, two minutes to go until the bus is due, although you were so used to it arriving a minute late, a safe bet on a Thursday at 5pm, just before evening at this time of year.

The darkness draws in as you notice a handful of the many cars that drive by, turn their headlights on, the cold momentarily feeling more biting as you look forward to walking into the warm kitchen and turning the lights on. The bus arrives as expected, the same experience as many times before, a little hurrah as the receipt from the ticket machine confirms another 2 weeks have been added to your prepaid card.

You haphazardly make your way to a seat on the right side of the centre of the bus, as usual, it started moving the second you took your card off the reader. Composing yourself after unintentionally and recklessly plonking yourself down on the seat, you get a judgemental look from the elderly man at the front seat on the left of the bus, you’d gotten so used to knowing the elderly folk by the different beige puffy coats they wear. 

The journey is mindless as you are, aware as you are nearly at your stop as you scramble to press the red square button, getting up as the bell dings and the sign saying the bus is stopping lights up.

The air outside feels sweetly comforting as you loved winter, the rain reminding you of a careless time, careless as the atmosphere unimposing. Walking down past the shopping precinct, you remember so vividly the hot summer months, money no object as slush puppies were in plentiful supply from the corner shop, now changed hands many times, now only representing expense and the reality of convenience consumerism.

The key goes in the lock, the walls will never tell, you are longing for contentment.

The lights in the kitchen go on, family pictures on the mantel piece in the living room, birthdays, reunions and gatherings, it transpires in your mind, you were fleetingly the centre of attention. A set of chores beckons, you feel lost for a second in emotion, not even in your thirties and the comfort of knowing a long life ahead is faded for this moment, the sharp chill of ice tears into your spine, will you forever be alone?

Your imagination goes wild as the warm embrace of those scenes in the movies, sun kissed bodies held up by beautiful garments, the intensity of their kisses dropping butterflies into your stomach, as the golden light comes through their window. It would always be your little secret that you watched for these scenes, their daily lives punctuated by a caress that you often hoped would send them to bed, never in polite company, your home is all yours and your privacy isn't shy.

You collect yourself for a moment, feeling hungry you get the pre prepared pasta from last night from the fridge, the meal is easy work as you stand at the window and scoop up the last few mouthfuls of the garlic cream covered pasta. 

The stairs creak as you tiptoe up them, passing many reminders of times gone by, the decided lust within you building, as does the emotion. Your laptop sits at the end of the bed, in a sleek, bright pink case, still plugged into the wall, it shouldn't be slow with a full battery charge of which you conciously register. 

The sky outside calming as it is cold yet comforting, the heaters only clicked on a few minutes ago. You surrender to the bed, a little effort to open the lid of the laptop and it automatically boots up, rummaging through the little cabinet under your bed, sorting through paperwork, at the bottom lay the DVD, a little joy as your fingers touch the plasic around the case. 

As you turn back round to face the laptop, you notice trails left by planes in the sky, remembering how it felt to be young without a care in the world, looking out your window in the dusk of summer at those trails. The DVD tray of your laptop clicks as it shuts, the swiping sound of the disc spins up is relieving, hard to believe in 2022, a DVD a would still function.

You load up the screen that tells you about all the storage on your computer, the disc drive showing "The_Ladies_Knight_DVD", confirming it has worked and is ready to play, you right click on it and select "Play in VLC Media Player". The tale of a woman finding love late in life, with all the beauty of herself, to a handsome and rich friend-of-a-friend, set in the 1890's. 

Now is a better time than any to admit to yourself of your lust, getting up off the bed and opening the drawer on the other side of the room, underneath all the socks lay a pink and black box, "Agent Provocatuer" emblazened on the lid with a luxury quality to the box. You sink inside as you pull the silicone rabbit toy from its box, still amazed at how smooth and silky it feels, even the control panel. 

You hop back on the bed, the music of the main menu of the DVD has been playing on repeat this whole time, you allow yourself to slide your knickers down, over your knee and past your ankles, it has been a while since you felt how good you feel on yourself. 

You click a few buttons on the laptop, going to the scene select screen, a click of the "next page" button and it appears, the scene that would make your heart sink, "Lovers Embrace" is the title. You pour a little bit of lube on to the tip of the toy, not being afraid to smooth it over the shaft, and another little blob more on the tip, smoothed.

You click on the scene and lay back, a carefree state of mind, a little grin as you get comfortable. The scene slowly fades in to a slow zoom on to a grand window, in a large ballroom, two people walking towards each other. A man wearing an immaculate white shirt, cuffs folded back and black trousers held up by braces, so good looking that you could only fantasise of him, meeting a woman, a golden, over the shoulder ball gown holds her together, her lips bright red with divine lipstick, her hair only adding prestige to her figure. 

The woman reaches to hold the man by the abdomen, sharing a kiss, intimacy perfectly depicted as they cease for a moment, she smiles and holds the shoulders of the man from the back, her body pressing against his as you feel aroused, her breasts curving as she embraces him. You press the on switch of the toy and no force is needed as the toy slides within you and you feel a burst of sensation.

The next moment she is naked, on top of him, her body bouncing up and down as she makes love to him, her breasts moving with the motion, you always loved the expression on her face, the moaning and grunting from him, as you slide the toy in and out, raising the vibration level, and it is an easy way to get close, as does she as her sex voice doesn't closely match that of her talking voice. 

The sex on screen becoming more sweaty and frantic, you now moaning yourself alluringly, as you come, almost in time with her. Now, you can see them with a clear mind. 

After Him

The night before Christmas, a view where snowflakes fall on to bitingly cold grass, your fingertips pressing against the glass of the window that leaks the outside chill. Under the windowsill sits the large chest of drawers, a coaster holding a warm mug of coffee atop it, the almost too hot but pleasant drink passes your lips as the calm and silence resonates within you.

The fabric of your duvet only slightly warmer as you tuck yourself in to enjoy your coffee, the bedside lamp has been off for a while, your wonder of the outside, like many years before this, before the dreadful events of the past two years, you have returned into yourself for a moment. The light from your phone screen momentarily stings your eyes, its been that long, taking in everything that feels lost, and everything that hasn't existed since your life changed at the start of all this.

A moment of blankness and you wonder what you should do, unlike you to spend an evening unoccupied, sometimes tense from depression, longing to fall asleep, sometimes exhausted, longing for the new day. 

A loss of purpose, heightened by the pressures of the situation, a release only on the promise of the people many can't prove their desperation. A little awareness to keep going, everything to live for, held back by that, it feels impossible to see beyond.  

You pick your phone up again, the apps come back as you slide your finger across the fingerprint button, left off between apps that appear at once, some hold no interest and some have a rare chance of someone reaching out. It transpires the allure in the room, you threw on some cheap lingerie as makeshift pyjamas, little energy to keep up with the washing, you have't been "there" in so long. 

Most days locked to the sofa, daytime TV and half a tub of Ben and Jerry's, your life mundane, that what used to excite you, now a distant memory. You feel a flutter in your stomach that fleetingly shocks your spine, the moan as you'd reach climax with him inside of you. makes your clit and nipples light up, he may be gone, but his memory can ignite what spice there is left, and promising a spring in your step for into the next morning.

You reach and turn over to the cabinet on the other side, rummaging at the bottom through socks and random trinkets, when your hand touches a matte cardboard box, a little struggle for it to be pulled out and you feel the heaviness that you had forgotten about. Thinking back to that one valentines day where he gifted you the vibrator, a secret kept and its memory bringing joy and naughtiness in this moment. 

Without a thought, your knickers slide off with one hand, trying to remember how to unlock the toy and turn it on with the other. Flinging the underwear off your feet the buttons light up pink, the shaft of the toy starts rotating, a vibration as strong as the first ever use, the battery still has enough charge, hopefully for one more orgasm, you mutter.

You relax yourself, your buttocks against the fabric, spread as the atmosphere in the room hits your stomach and flower, your breasts engorging against the black frilly bra, the lack of underwire allowing seductive comfort. You lower the speed of the shaft and slowly massage the head of your clit with the rabbit part of the toy, a memory of him against you half consumes your mind. Your pussy now bravely wet as you give in to the seduction of the memory, how warm it all felt, how you could never hold back from the pleasure. 

Soon enough your flower takes the length of the toy inside, the sound in the room that of the bed holding your weight, and that of your sex, flutters of moans, unknown to everyone as they were gracefully away. You feel butterflies that will never go away, the emotion of your love for him released when you cum, the next day he will be with you, the memory of sex allowing your release, playing with your nipples and time no longer a factor, him kissing your nipples adding to the jaw dropping event. 

For the first time in as long as you can remember, you feel happy to wash your bed sheets the next morning, he helped you out once again.

Joyce's Delight

An autumnal morning with a slight chill in the air, softened by the glow of the sun at ten minutes to eight in the morning. Forgetting the liberation of a day to yourself, a time so sweet as to help you rule your own kingdom. Thirty minutes pass as the guilt sets in, life is always best when on a roll, that one goal, the passion set free, feeling so positive as the morning iced coffee gets poured.

Your calmness sets as the cleaner definitely did a good job, looking out on to blue skies across open green space with houses dotted about, the world just about coming alive. The past two weeks of work, 14 hour days, non stop, your feet only starting to not ache, you tear yourself away from the view to go and sit on the sofa, maybe a little too relaxed as you turn to lay across.

Making your way through the bowl of cereal, you finish off the coffee and feel bright, no grogginess here as you are, as if it were lunch time. You hear the rockery up your drive rustling, footsteps that sound ever so promising, before its suddenly close and a polite use of the door knocker gets you up quickly. Soon enough, you are cradling a box down your front hall and into your living room, placing it down on to the side table. Curious, you try and remember what you ordered, a quick think through your emails, hidden behind a mass of work correspondence, it hits you that you ventured to the naughty side of the internet, oh dear.

Laboriously sorting through the post, the parcel remains last, past all the correspondence and surveys, and that damned aunt Barbara who wont leave you alone, you feel a daring guilt as you go and grab the scissors to tear through the parcel tape. Slicing through the middle to seperate the two lids of the parcel, a suppressed memory comes back as a surprise, it all rings a bell.

Surprised by the elegance of the box, imposing an allure not invited, like an admission of past sensual joy, it has its chance to help you decide. A little curious, you slide the box open to see the impressive design, going as far as to excite you a little. You bite your lip autonomously, before a suggestive shuffle towards and up the staircase.

Adorning the double bed, neatly made and a duvet with soft fabric, you open the box completely, placing the box next to you on the bed, the matte cardboard rectangular cover beside it. You pick the toy up, its shaft, a treat for the g spot, feeling luxurious and flawlessly soft, the control panel designed so intuitively it should be illegal for the designer not to work for Apple. 

You press the most obvious "on" button, the toy hums at its lowest setting, you feel an excitement but a shudder pulse of guilt shooting up your spine, these things had never really been for you, sure to change for a collection of minutes. Both box and cover whisked on to the side cabinet, you get comfortable on the bed, the arousal constant and internal giggles take over.

Pulling your joggers down, underneath, a curvy figure and lace knickers, a sense of freedom as you spread your legs as you feel your nipples harden. Lust drenched as you pull your knickers from under you, past your bottom and pussy, only then you notice how wet you are. In one hand and they pull past your feet, a feeling of a day lost comes over you as you lay in bed, ready to make scenes worthy of hollywood movies.

Finding the perfect setting on the toy as your fantasies replay in your mind, that one sculpted guy who came to do the garden, getting sweaty as you rode his perfect cock, working as hard, on you, as he did pushing the lawnmower. The toy easily enters you, its vibrations as effective as they felt new. 

You feel flustered as your breathing gets heavier, the dream of your body taking every inch of his, sex that didn't need a reason. The toy hits your g spot with full accuracy and depth, your pussy a puddle of involuntary movements, dripping ominously as your inner urges take over. A daydream of loving intimacy, his skin against yours as he gets close with you nearing orgasm with an almost impossible level of perfection, and with that, you do.


Upon the morning, without a mind's thought, that would drift into afternoon, but only with the lift of the sound of the sea. The tension is deafened by the vastness of the sinking, only to create a new world, a story that will be placed in your heart.

The urgency lost but intense, relaxing in the caravan as the afternoon starts to mature. Only the windows and the doors being open can silence a happening of carnal magnitude. Sitting in your loosely revealing yet socially formal dress, many a man have glanced at your curvaceous yet enticing figure, a world of positive attention as you feel free on the spontaneous trip down to the beach. Your friends have gone down to the pier, promising to return with a meal of Fish and Chips, probably a few hours with slight boredom setting in as the mood hints at dragging on.

A quick browse of the fridge as a subtle hit of chilly air hits your face, the little sweet serving of chocolatey shortbread that sits near the back of the fridge entices you deeply, although you now reserve such treats to enhance accomplishments, that new client signed up at work, a new series on Netflix binged or a thrilling orgasm. The mood feels right to let go a little, what would the holiday be without letting go a little more, after all, this year of all years has been hard on everyone.

Almost absent mindedly but definitely decidedly, the doors and windows start getting shut, the dare turns to internal excitement, the naughty little treat packed away deep in your bag, as had satisfied you before, timidly pulled out with the door shutting behind you. An elegant yet greedy shimmy towards the bed as you get comfortable, free with your movements as you feel an inner spark, your lacey knickers coming down over your knees.

Spreading your legs as the wet folds of your flower come apart with your thighs, you refrain from touching yourself, letting the small silicone bullet, now maneuvered between your fingers, send the first pulse of pleasure as it contacts with your clitoris. Spreading your legs further apart as the almost surprise that you feel so carnal, so wanting, in the first moments of masturbation, you breath gets sharper as a little chirp of a moan comes out. 

The feel of the sea air against your skin helps re focus your mind on relaxation, as if you were there, the people suggestively dressed in the way that just gets you going, you press and move the bullet quicker and closer. A little reminder of the summer fling from a few years ago, how you found his cock magnificent and like morphine, in private and in a little secluded spot out on the cliff edge, starts to get you going, chirps turning to gasps.

You get a moment of anxiety to see that the window curtains are definitely shut, your pleasure brought back instantly and softly, you start moving to make it work, like with an ease is it good and rewarding, decadently pleasurable. The tension building up within your groin, you feel dominated by the dare, the synthetic feeling of guilt increasing with every burst of ecstacy, no way back as the final moments drown you in a release so guilty but so adventurous and relaxing. You catch you breath feeling confident and liberated, they were never back in plenty of time.


Emotion comes over you as the wind becomes a breeze, a comfort of a small chill lowers your tension in a thready yet lushious way, like chocolate melting on the tongue. Looking over the fields, the sun setting with a reflection that tears against the fences, you've only known such beauty when coming here. Many Septembers before this, you'd drop yourself into the serenity of the vista, a gateway into the only bliss you know.

A cold glass of cola infuses the calm with a hint of vanilla, this summer has brought you back to your inner feeling, a year of worry that petrified your imagined loss of being. Only the way today has fallen into you, an exact return of freedom and the butterflies it brings. Memories of TV programs of the summer fields, showing an almost alien carefree existence, for once you feel you've hit the end of the movie like world that has played out for many months.

Three in the afternoon, the height of the warmth of any day, you were always one to enjoy the sultry suggestion of the sun against the skin, a phantom of allure, only sometimes seducing you into sexual abandon. You relax more into the car seat, the left passenger door open for you to stretch your legs, a wisp of air pulling them apart ever so slowly and without awareness.

The warmth in the air blends in with the smell of the grass and lavender, reminding you of the summertime romance from a few years ago, a couple of incredibly satisfying nights in the sheets, a hanful of frolics out in the countryside. The olfactory pleasantry hits that one thing inside you, a key going into a lock, as you fall into a sudden inspiration.

An upbringing of allure creeps up down below, instantly but subtly the feeling of being the most horny you've ever been. You inhale one more time as the euphoria hits you and suggests you into giving in, a quick glance in both directions to make sure no ones around. Timidly unzipping your jeans as the decadence and dare make your stomach sink, not long before your nipples press against your top with your fingers sliding down past the border of your knickers to your dripping flower.

You press against both lips with both your longest fingers, the way to an orgasm becoming clearer as you begin to masturbate, your breasts begging for attention of which they surely get. The sun setting to soak you in its shine, the memories of your romance making your masturbation automatic, almost hurried as your play which leaves nothing unattended, you moan instinctively, a sound not meant for the area. You insert your fingers inside yourself, touching your well mastered g spot that brings you to the edge, the risk of anyone seeing you is drowned out but only half as intense as you now cumming and spoiling the seat with your squirt. As natural as anything else, you sit, living like all around you. 


The Lush

You look out of the window at the vineyard, vast fields of grapes into the distance. The cracks in the sill add a charm of warmth, the sun becomes orange as it sets, the chill throughout the day still feels fresh on your fingers. Only the memories that bring happiness can be felt, only you create the beauty in the room, a comfy jumper and jeans that take you back to simpler times, the first time in a year that hasn't been chaotic.

The bed behind you perfectly made, the boiler just now ticking over and the heating coming on, the duvet comforting as you sit on the side of the bed, facing the window, only your conscience can descend. Your shoulders ease as a light of a sensation crawls up your spine, the sun inching into the ground, a shudder of a ripple, black and alluring as if it was nightfall.

The reset until the morning hour, a release of course needed, modesty closely guarded along with your inner desire to indulge yourself at the selfishness of the demand. You timidly make moves to pull your jeans down, exercising your right to lay down and get comfortable, your jeans at your knees as you slide your fingers behind the material of your knickers, the chill up your spine as you pull them past your buttocks and off with the jeans.

The only help you need is your mind, your flower slippery on first stroke with two fingers, your pleasure guided and seduced by your own intuition. You let go and spread your legs, commiting to the pursuit of an orgasm. Your masturbation feels ever so good, the touching intensifying yout arousal as you get ever so more wet, the memories of that summer hook up last year acting as the fuel for your sure fire descent into bliss.

As if you can feel the weight on your body, your fingers now a tribute to the cock you thought was perfect, deep inside you as you shy away from the bliss of then, as if it can happen again. Bravery and you explore further, the pleasure more genuine than most of the past year, that sweet spot that brings in the final moments. The people downstairs feel anxious as you moan on orgasm, selfish but liberating, demanding but natural. 

The fields outside, another feeling of warmth.


A dreary breeze falters into the morning, a deceivingly icy wind comes through the window, grey clouds muffle the concrete that was not long ago glistening golden. Freedom from the slowness, the restraint untied, ice cold drink and porridge with fresh fruit, a return to the simplicity of calmer times.

You turn the TV on, the day cheats its way to fading into much later in the morning, 10.30am and still in your pink chemise from bed time, there appears to be nothing at all to watch on TV, just the same old repeated news about the pandemic and ineffective chitter chatter about what rules should, and shouldn't be applied.

Maybe it's just the perpetual daily slumber everyone is in, life truly is locked into simple indulgence with the bottom line of no connection. Perhaps this is the pause we were all teased into taking, for the first time a serene derealisation, the world in a state of calm crisis, a million snow storms with terror beyond control.

You find yourself, laying there, feeling the cloud of the slumber, trying to decide what to do in a loss of direction, with a boredom that has a tinge of frustration. A cheeky thought, the little giggle as you think of using your vibrator, a Doxy wand that arrived only a few weeks ago after a late night drunk order. You make your way into your bedroom, pulling the circular knob on the drawer, and under some disorganised clothes, the Doxy lay, still in its box, the security seals only undone to check all was correct.

You feel an almost whipping of horniness, the geyser of a sunken stomach, free flying butterflies shake you, just as the first time. Now back in your living room, the inspiration has sedated your arousal into daring, with you now closing the curtains. 

Only a little dexterity required as you plug the Doxy into the wall, laying on your sofa with your pussy aching to be thrilled in what it dares. Your fingertips slide just under the end of your chemise, a white pattern lines the pink satin. The fabric coming closer to your stomach slowly, your pussy feeling even more teased as the sweet feeling is now constant. 

You navigate the control panel of the Doxy, only then do you commit to what you almost never admit, not in the company of others, whilst the toy autonomically before you know it, is now being delightful down below. The head massages, up and down as the sensations become sweet pin pricks, a shockwave of a jolt as you press the head against your clit.

You keep it there, pushing down to complete the ecstacy, giving your whole pussy the indulgence that you deserve. Not long before the making of your dry spell culminates in a gasp inducing, pillow wetting orgasm. For that minute, you rest on the freedom.


The rays beat down, allure exudes against the temptation of the warmth, giving in to the freedom of carelessness, seductive hearts fade from love. The grass is freshly cut among sun beds, drips of water fall down the sides of glasses, ice chilled beverages and the cream filled lollies that are leisurely consumed by the few people who choose to bear all, the hottest day of the year.

The blaze basks across my torso, allowing sunken butterflies to flutter at the bottom of my stomach easier, nothing truly matters for this hour, we both tiptoe on the edge of the euphoria of days of unknowing and naivety. With only thin layers covering us, lust is only a suggestion, the day maturing past half two, the first hints of late afternoon laziness, start to become front and centre - as does my marvel at the brazen moments of passion we've always shared.

From where we sit, the sun is just starting to move out of the way, I wonder if we should surrender to going inside, the fans in the living room only blowing out mildly warm air, still a chance to have a half time break, a refresher behind closed doors. 

I pitch the suggestion, a sigh as you sit up, you realise you need a refill of the strawberry cola, where the ice cubes, now tiny pearls at the sides of the glass. You agree, picking up the glass and your bit of summer reading, a romance novel that had always piqued your interest, a naughty little delivery that you proudly displayed for everyone walking past.

The front door of our little bedsit shuts behind us, as we traipse into the kitchen, me working my way through the fridge, loads of chocolate and various fizzy and alcoholic drinks being chilled. You jump on the bed, getting comfortable as your stringy bikini, just about holding your perfect body, as you see me getting the snacks and drinks ready, you feel your skin pushing against your bikini top, your brain catches up with your sudden almost stomach dropping interest. 

Your nipples hardening as little pin pricks of arousal happen down below, it becomes increasingly hard to not show your feelings of lust. I lay down next to you as your allure is ever so evident, it just turns me on as you melt into the thorn of lust that tears through you, caressing and grabbing me. Our clothes quickly taken off as you make your way on top of me, your soft thighs collding with my firm, sculpted groin. 

Your pussy desperately wet, the intensity of your breathing sharpens, you moan as I whisper "fuck" as the full weight effortlessly makes my perfect, to you, cock get deeper inside. Not a lot of effort is required to have you feeling every thrust that you hold on to, your bikini top now an afterthought as you love me licking and tickling your nipples. 

You cannot bear it any longer, as you soak the sheets with a sun drenched, leg shaking and pussy quenching orgasm. It's almost as if, our emotion is forever.